Emptying my thoughts
Today was my last external presentation to FAs.
I fumbled quite a bit, being slightly sad, slightly unprepared and slightly nervous.
I am seldom nervous during presentations but increasingly I feel a lack of confidence.
Perhaps its because of the reason event that has happened, perhaps its because of my sadness over leaving the company I was with for 5 years and 9 months.
Sometimes I wonder, am I making the right decision? But day after day, I feel that the decisions seems more and more right to me. There's too much not done and too little I could do to improve the situation. Some times it is not escaping it is not pessimism, its just realism.
But what I truly hope is that after I leave the firm. Things could change for the better. People up there could understand what's wrong with the system and better it. Such that, next time I will see so much more improvements in the company that I would not regret making the right decision.
I am sad. I am a person with emotions. However, I know that being sad will not and does not help much. In fact, being emotional means lower intellect levels. Because too much time is spent on thinking about emotions rather than about constructive ideas to resolve issues. I think I can be less emotional if I follow the buddha teachings to let go of things more and be more flexible in thinking.
I believe that if I don't want to wait for a big shock before I change my character. Buddhist teachings could help. That's because buddhist teachings can amazingly change people's life and character.
Was thinking. If I am not happy in the new place will I come back. I answered to my trusted colleague, no.
Now I must restructure my life too. Since I have more time on hands. Of course, the most important thing is to study my CFA. But after that I have a lot of other plans including studying MBA and continuing my diet and exercise plans that I abandoned after starting to study more fequently.
Tomorrow, I am going to stop talking about my unhappiness in the company. I am going to try to look forward and see if there is anything that I could do to improve myself and efficiently finish my work on time and go back quickly to study.
Cheers
Ching Cheng
Mood: Good actually except for not performing well enough for the presentation tonight.
I fumbled quite a bit, being slightly sad, slightly unprepared and slightly nervous.
I am seldom nervous during presentations but increasingly I feel a lack of confidence.
Perhaps its because of the reason event that has happened, perhaps its because of my sadness over leaving the company I was with for 5 years and 9 months.
Sometimes I wonder, am I making the right decision? But day after day, I feel that the decisions seems more and more right to me. There's too much not done and too little I could do to improve the situation. Some times it is not escaping it is not pessimism, its just realism.
But what I truly hope is that after I leave the firm. Things could change for the better. People up there could understand what's wrong with the system and better it. Such that, next time I will see so much more improvements in the company that I would not regret making the right decision.
I am sad. I am a person with emotions. However, I know that being sad will not and does not help much. In fact, being emotional means lower intellect levels. Because too much time is spent on thinking about emotions rather than about constructive ideas to resolve issues. I think I can be less emotional if I follow the buddha teachings to let go of things more and be more flexible in thinking.
I believe that if I don't want to wait for a big shock before I change my character. Buddhist teachings could help. That's because buddhist teachings can amazingly change people's life and character.
Was thinking. If I am not happy in the new place will I come back. I answered to my trusted colleague, no.
Now I must restructure my life too. Since I have more time on hands. Of course, the most important thing is to study my CFA. But after that I have a lot of other plans including studying MBA and continuing my diet and exercise plans that I abandoned after starting to study more fequently.
Tomorrow, I am going to stop talking about my unhappiness in the company. I am going to try to look forward and see if there is anything that I could do to improve myself and efficiently finish my work on time and go back quickly to study.
Cheers
Ching Cheng
Mood: Good actually except for not performing well enough for the presentation tonight.
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